Yeah. My mind is at a standstill today…Not sure why… Just when I think I’m out of this fucking haze….I am still feeling it and feel the urge to bash my head in the wall, even though there’s zero temptation of taking anything or getting shitfaced drunk. Being so used to being in an Altered State of Consciousness [that’s a fucking great song by Mors Principium Est, by the way] all the time is so different than it is now with a clear perspective…It’s crazy how you think Life is when your mind and body are clouded, to what it REALLY is like when you’re off everything… Yeah, things are the same in a sense, everything that was outside before is still in it’s place unless weather destroyed it or something was demolished, and people are still…people and still human…although some are just fucking crazy, like REALLY fucking crazy, being honest… …I MEAN…..Look at the fucking world….OH MY GOD, REALLY!!!!!!….HOW DID WE GET TO THIS FUCKING POINT…. WHAT IN THE FUCK HAPPENED!!!!!!?!?!?!?!?! *SCREAMS* A;UGHOIF;AWEHUTGHE;DSFHAKSDNHFKJASH;UAGHWEIUOA;GTIOEUR;GHKJDHUIARAOER;THEWSHF;IUHhhhHHhHHHHhhhhhHHHHHHhhhhh ……..Yet things are different with a clear mind, you TRULY realize most people you meet are on something anyway or liquid inebriated or all of the above and then some, fighting their own serpents even if they don’t realize if their serpent inside is consuming them or not — or maybe they do realize it and they are caught in the same 24/7 back and fourth darkness in their mind that I was in of wanting and wishing to be clean & sober, but yet haven’t found that inner strength yet to overpower that gnawing, aching temptation that’s like a drill constantly spinning at the back of your neck in one spot the entire time, not quite puncturing the skin…
Anddddddd your perspective is totally different off everything…You see the Truth in everything….Andddddddd you see the bullshit, you see A LOT of bullshit….
.Andddddddddddddddddd fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck I just want to SCREAM and cry…
AK;DSJFIOAHIUESHT8IAEWY9TR83Y48957270UIFJASIDH&*%%$^%#^%DAIDDOFJAIOHERFHADFHAISHDFIUAEHFAHDSFJAHIODHFOEW;HTA94YU5
"Music, it will set you Free"
“So pray to music build a shrine…
Worship in these desperate times…
Fill your heart with every note…
Cherish it and cast afloat…
‘Cause god is in these clef and tone…
Salvation is found alone…
Haunted by its melody…
Music, it will set you Free…
Let it set you Free….
We build cathedrals to our pain…
Establish monuments to attain…
Freedom from all of the scars and the sins…
Lest we drown in the darkness within…
MUSIC MY SAVIOR…SAVE ME…”
